kepthimhuman: (Default)
Neal Cassidy ([personal profile] kepthimhuman) wrote2014-11-18 06:46 pm
Entry tags:

HMD

Comments? Concerns? Questions? Let me know.

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onlyonecontract: ([G] Unsure)

[personal profile] onlyonecontract 2014-11-27 01:36 am (UTC)(link)
Hey! Friendly neighborhood sock account here and I’d like to leave you some feedback on the way you play Neal Cassidy. It’s come to my attention that you do his impassive nature very well but that part of his character isn't compensated by introspection in tags. In order to keep threads moving other players, including myself, need what his inner reactions might be to bounce off of to reply to tags. Think of it like a road map. While he may not be saying much, he is expressing as most characters do within Once Upon A Time. The lack of emotion makes it hard, as a player, to gauge where the thread should go next when replying. I would also like to point out that you have a tendency to ignore hooks. By that I mean:

Character A: Hey let’s go get coffee.

Character B: Sure.

Character A: Well, let’s go.

This is an instance in where a hook has been ignored. Instead it should read something like:

Character A: Hey, let go get coffee.

Character B: Sure. I know a good place. [insert action spammy things here] What did you want to talk about?

Character A: [insert action spam] We need to talk about the thing. . . .

That helps the thread keep moving on both ends. Just as if Character B were to suggest something, or move forward in the thread, Character A would be expected to not only react to that but give Character B something else to react to so that tags aren't going in circles. Make sense?

Touching more on Neal being impassive, or coming across that way, he is actually a very expressive character in subtle ways. When Gold comes to find in Manhattan he’s driven to run because he doesn't want to look back on his past. That is an emotional reaction that motivates his character movement. We see this sort of outburst (not necessarily running) but an emotional outburst when Neal finds out what really happened to Milah.

I’d also like to mention that he does, in fact, open up to some characters such as Emma. He is in love with her still for better or for worse. He did leave her so that she could fulfil some destiny and that /hurt/ him even if he is trapping that inside in some ways.

My point with that being his inner thoughts are more important than ever with your playing if you plan to conceal a lot by having your character say very little. This is definitely something I think can improve easily because you seem to have a grasp on Neal as a person! So please don’t take this as a need for a canon review or anything like that.

I just wanted to get it out there that it’s very hard to play against you when there isn't much given in return. Going back the scenarios it puts all of the weight on Character A to push the thread forward instead of sharing that weight between both characters as an interactive conversation.
prophetepiphany: (Default)

[personal profile] prophetepiphany 2015-12-29 01:38 pm (UTC)(link)
I've literally never left feedback on one of these types of posts before, and I don't know how to offer advice to change anything, but I feel like I would want to be aware if this were me, so I could work on things. You seem to mostly play Neal like a jerk. I know that everyone reads canon differently, and that's fine, but he's never come across on screen as overly jealous, or like he'd hold a giant grudge about something Emma said or did (she told him she wished he was dead and he hugged her? He respected that), or Emma dating someone other than him. Especially at the point Neal died - he actively told Emma to go be happy, to find Tallahassee. Just because he's suddenly alive again in a game doesn't mean he gets to take that back and be less honorable. This is a man who laid down his life for her, to save everyone, but that absolutely does not mean she owes him anything. She is not obligated to fall all over Neal as if his death should change her entire opinion on whether or not she should pick him and love him in a game setting. The person who plays Emma may be okay with how you're playing this, but to others it's completely OOC.

You write Neal as very possessive of people he thinks should just be 'his.' He comes across as stand-offish and just plain immature. Like I said, I really don't know how to 'fix' that, other than to encourage you to watch more of his episodes and specifically focus on his voice.